The Only Way
The Living Conundrum, A Box With No Lid, The Lifetime Privilege
"Our biggest fear is taking the risk to be alive and to express what we really are. Just being ourself is the biggest fear of humans."
- Don Miguel Ruiz, The Four AgreementsPrelude
The living conundrum:
Here’s an insight that stopped me in my tracks this week:
The #1 regret of those on their deathbeds is ‘I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.’ - h/t Bronnie Ware
Reading this made me reflect on why we commonly let our lives go by without living them and what lesson I can take away.
The conundrum of living is that during the period when we still believe time is plentiful, we also fear expressing ourselves fully, and as a result, when we realise time is running out, our biggest regret is that we weren’t courageous enough to live a life true to ourselves while we had the chance.
In other words, all too often, our lives are controlled by the illusory constructs of our minds — time and fear.
The alternative? Live from the heart in the now.
Note to self:
Fear is a precursor to regret. Where you fear being true to yourself now predicts the regret you’ll have come the end if you continue to let fear rule your choices.
A box with no lid:
Norms, rules, opinions, and expectations form the four walls of the box society attempts to put you in, but you’ll never be trapped when your free will is the lid they cannot control. You are only truly boxed in when you place a ceiling on yourself.
As George Orwell rightly said in 1984, “They fear love because it creates a world they can’t control.”
Open up; don’t close yourself or become smaller due to the opinions, fears, and limitations others try to impose on you. The only purpose they ever serve is to lock you in the illusion that who you are is separate, lacking, and incomplete — which, when explored, contains zero substance.
Interlude
LVN Stories
A collection of stories from those aligning their lives with meaning and wellbeing.
See the full collection here.
The lifetime privilege:
The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.
- Carl Jung
The life most true to you will naturally open up when you replace conformity with curiosity and courage.
Better to live true to yourself and be misunderstood than live to the beat of everyone else and not know yourself.
The only way to do it is your way.
Postlude
Every living person is an author. Each day you rise, you write your story.
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I try to keep each edition of Live Free to a 3-minute reading time in the interest of your busy days, which means personal anecdotes often get left out. If you’re interested in reading more reflections and contributing your perspectives on the ideas shared today, you’re welcome to join our free subscriber community chat.
Keen to hear from you.
Live Free,
Niall
Niall, this really resonated with me, especially the part about the "conundrum of living." It’s so true that we often wait too long to be true to ourselves, only realizing the weight of time when it feels like it’s slipping away. The idea of living from the heart, in the now, feels like both a challenge and an invitation. Your reflections remind me that fear doesn’t just steal joy in the present, but plants the seeds for future regret. Thanks for sharing this timely insight!
The Top Five Regrets of the Dying was a huge wakeup call for me many years ago, and what you've written here is a beautiful reminder. Thank you. 🙏